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Their behavior is destroying our family/relationship. Like many of us I’m related to a lot of mentally ill people. Stop arranging the desk chairs and get on a damn lifeboat. There are at least a couple of bipolars and likely a schizophrenic or two hiding in the wings. People who won’t get treatment and continue to hurt you are the Titanic. Forgiveness is the attribute of the strong.” ~Mahatma Gandhi Up until my early twenties, I carried around a lot of anger toward someone in my life.I’d been hurt by a person I trusted, and for a long time in my adolescence I wanted to hurt them back.I lived in painful stories and in visions of what could have been if I hadn’t been wronged.I blamed someone else for the life I didn’t have, and felt vindicated in the soul-sucking resentment I carried around from day to day.I remember playing video games, I remember playing on the lawn, I remember how he screamed when he broke his arm, I remember how thrilled he was when he got a remote-controlled car for Christmas, and I remember the way he used to twirl his hair around his finger so it was always in knots. And now he is an abusive, destructive force that no one can stand to be around lest they get pulled into convincing delusions and psychoses or have to fear his violent rage. Being in the same room with him is like being hit repeatedly with a hard, blunt abject.

One of the worst things that an individual can do in early recovery is jump headfirst into romance.Others were faced with a slow, subtle deterioration which finally brought them to the point of admitting defeat. The first bet to a problem gambler is like the first small drink to an alcoholic.Sooner or later he or she falls back into the same old destructive pattern.So perhaps the kindest thing I can do both for them and me is retell the story, but instead create a new one: a story about letting go.It’s a hard thing to do—to completely let go of something painful and forgive the person who may or may not have realized what they did.




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